NaNo: Jackie's Lament
[Fiction] Friday Challenge for November, 14 2008:Write about a Hunter’s Moon.
... and I'll also include this week's 3WW #CXI:blush quiver tenderness
Others have gone a-hunting
I too hunt, but a different prey
I dally under the fronds of the willow tree,
green dress undulating in the breeze,
almost luminous, reflecting the light of the Hunter's Moon.
Others ready their bows and arrows
I too ready myself, but all I need do is blush
I giggle under the fronds of the willow tree,
long black hair flowing in the breeze,
almost luminous, reflecting the light of the Hunter's Moon.
Others launch their weapons
I need only gesture invitingly
Their prey lie twitching and bleeding
Mine quiver in anticipation
Theirs know oblivion
Mine seek tenderness
Just as the others must gut and skin their now-dead chase
I too gut mine
but gloriously alive
I drink the terror
I drink the fear
I rip him open
And drink some more
Lifeblood pulsing
Ecstasy rising
As full as the moon
I float
I fly
As alive as I can ever be
beyond the fronds of the willow tree
green dress still undulating, black hair still flowing
Thus the others look up from their task and gasp
'Tis only me, my friends
Only me, and the Hunter's Moon
This kinda wrote itself.. not sure where or how it'll appear in my NaNo quite yet, but I do know that Jackie starts questioning her "nature" at ~some~ point, perhaps this'll be one of the products of her introspection...
8 comments:
I don't often get surprised by poetry but the switch was well done. Strange to say it but you lulled me into a false sense of security. I thought you were placing seduction next to hunting purely symbolically, not literally, which made it all the more surprising when you changed tack.
It's always nice to be surprised.
I want to know more about Jackie!
warming up to you and lot more...
I liked it. Sounds like some of the characters in my stories.
Nice!
"Lifeblood pulsing Ecstasy rising"
I can feel this happening!
This is so good. It evokes the autumn season, as hunters head for the woods.
I'm putting BRIGHT halters on my chestnut horses. 8-)
Blessings,
Linda
FAREWELL TO A FRIEND, on THE MANE POINT
Great job! I was able to easily picture this in my mind as I read it - could clearly see the green dress, the long hair...the bows and arrows, etc.
I've got mine up at my blog now too.
Shelley
http://inkscrawls.blogspot.com
Willow - I could tell that there was some simmering danger in the first couple stanzas but wow. . . the ending is amazing.
The line, "green dress undulating in the breeze. . ." has a fantastic rhythm to it. In fact the whole poem does.
Jackie does sound like a very interesting character. I hope you'll bring out more, but this was very well done.
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